Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Beep.
Beep who?
Beep, beep: coming through!
What do you get if you divide the circumference of a Jack-o-Lantern by its diameter?
Pumkin Pi!
A teacher was asking her class: “What is the difference between `unlawful and `illegal`?”
Only one hand shot up.
“OK, answer, Joan,” said the teacher.
“Unlawful is when you do something the council doesn’t allow and illegal is a sick eagle.”
Imagine there was a hen on a roof. The wind was going 90 miles West. It laid an egg; which way did it roll down?
Neither! You’re just imagining!
One person has a pet centipede. He asked it to get the paper. Two hours later he goes out to see what was happening. The centipede said:
Wait! I still don’t have all my shoes on?
Why was the rabbit always getting his sister in trouble?
Because his name was Buster! (bust her)
