What did the banana say to the other banana?
Let’s split up!
A police officer spots a car on the highway going about 22mph, so he stops the car, with a lady and some of her friends, and tells the lady how dangerous is to be going slow as it is to speed. The lady answers “Officer I was going the speed limit! 22mph!”
The officer says… that is the highway #.. That’s what highway you’re on. But I need to ask you, are your friends okay, they seem a little shaken up and pale…
She answers “Oh they’ll be fine in a couple of seconds, we just got off of highway 119.”
Why do T-rexes wear flip flops?
Because they have such tiny arms!
Imagine you are on a boat. Suddenly your boat sinks. You paddle in the water. Another boat passes you and you try to stop it, but you can’t. Sharks form around you.
What do you do?
Stop imagining!
Doctor, Doctor, I need glasses!
You sure do, this is a butcher shop!
What is the difference between chocolate and cheese?
The cheese is never late!
