I got my wife laser eye surgery for her birthday.
She dumped me.
People Jokes
Anthony: Pete and Repeat decided to go on a camping trip. When they set up camp, Pete went outside the tent to go to the bathroom. Who was left inside?
You: Repeat.
Anthony: Pete and Repeat decided to go an a camping trip. When they set up camp, Pete went outside the tent to go to the bathroom. Who was left inside?
You: Repeat
Anthony: Pete and Repeat…
Anthony: Pete and Repeat decided to go an a camping trip. When they set up camp, Pete went outside the tent to go to the bathroom. Who was left inside?
You: Repeat
Anthony: Pete and Repeat…
Where did the Egyptian boy get the flu from?
His mummy!
Did you hear about the beggar that had a stuffy nose?
Yeah, I heard he couldn’t catch a cent!
Three guys are out hunting.
The first guy goes out and comes back with a rabbit. “How did you get that?” the other guys ask. “I followed the rabbit tracks” he answers.
The second guy goes out and comes back with a turkey. “How did you get that?” the other guys ask. “I followed the turkey tracks” He answers.
The third guy goes out and comes back all bloody and torn up. “What happened?” the other guys ask.
“I followed the train tracks.”
Did you hear about the Karate champion who joined the navy?
I hear he was terrible. The first time he saluted, he nearly killed himself!
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