Cat Jokes

Vet: Why is your cat’s hair seared off?
Me: Well, my lizard likes to play…
Vet: What kind of lizard is that?!

How come the animals in the jungle don’t play cards?

So one cat died and went to heaven and Saint Peter was at the gates and said to the cat, “Is there something I can do to make your stay better? Five days later five mice were killed in a tragic farming accident and went to heaven and were offered the same deal. They said, “All our lives we have been chased by dogs, cats and women with brooms; we are tired of being chased and they were fitted into roller skates. A week later Saint Peter checked on the cat and the cat said:

Why has no one ever spotted a leopard in Africa?

Why shouldn’t you play a game with African cats?